I had a bad experience of what I would say is spiritual abuse by a hardline coC preacher online, it was comparatively really mild and short lived (lasting a mere week) in relation to others here, although it has had an impact about a month later. I am grateful to God and to all here for this forum, as it was a great help in validation in the initial stages of leaving. I am a Gen-Z and quite young (I still live with my parents), so I am on the internet a lot. Sorry, this is a long and disorganised post but I really need to vent and I felt it necessary to mention many details.
I was a devout Evangelical (with some Hebrew roots leanings, and I had interest with fringe groups and conspiratorial groups such IFBs) until I encountered an online article in January of this year by a Church of Christ preacher named Brian Yeager (I use his name since he is quite public with it, and you can google him to confirm) in El Paso, TX, specifically in response to giving up everything for Christ. He is fringe even among the non-institutionals (he rejects Florida College as sin).
I read his other teachings and little by little I started accepting them, partially due to the presentation of scripture and the amount of scripture he threw out. I felt I couldn't refute it. I also had few people to talk to since I am a bit of a loner, and I wasn't going to a church because I was quite concerned about sabbath issues (Hebrew roots). It started with instrumental music, which I accepted as unbiblical but I was dismissive about the rest and read him occasionally.
Around late May of this year, I was having a bad time and I had some free time due to quarantine. I started reading his articles slowly but then I essentially binged his articles. I started accepting his teachings, not because I wanted it to be true, but because I couldn't refute it. This created a great fear and anxiety within me, so much so that I was physically affected with symptoms such as gerd, shaky legs, an inability to focus on anything other than his articles, and a general stiffness. I talked to my dad archaically about him and the doctrines, so he started to suspect something. I accepted the idea of baptism being necessary to salvation (which in some strange way saved me from becoming coC), and so I feared that I might die without baptism. We live in a Third World country as expats, so thankfully there's no strong presence of the coC, plus we know some non-denominational missionaries, so I reasoned that since I couldn't be baptised at a coC, a non-denominational baptism would suffice. I asked my dad to ask them to baptise me, since he had contact with them. It was that evening that I talked to him about the guy and he was concerned.
Eventually I encountered some of his seriously outlandish and seriously harmful teachings which pushed me over the edge (note: these aren't the only bad ones as most of you know, they were just instrumental
in bringing me away), which included:1) You aren't allowed to bond with "apostates or heretics" among the brethren (Everyone I knew and loved was in this category)
2) God no longer interferes outside natural means, meaning you can't pray for anything outside forgiveness, or 'providence'. You can cast your anxieties on GOD but He can't give you spiritual comfort (and to pray for that is sinful and will send you to hell since the Holy Spirit ceased).
3) (I contacted him on this via email along with other things) You aren't allowed to give to charity organizations outside the church, be they religious or not. Also, you cannot run soup kitchens, almshouses etc. in a secular manner because God tells you to give directly to the needy (also he was really stingy with who was needy and made it nigh impossible to give worthily). God also only ordained 3 institutions: the church, the home, and the government
I talked to my parents about 1 which I was sadly convinced, I think I nearly cried when I heard it (I barely cry), my parents' response was solid as they got me in contact with the missionaries and later talked to me out of serious concern. I talked to the missionary and it took me 2 days to finally come away. I heard number 3 which made me angry, and that evening I talked with the missionary for a 2nd time and he was the final nail in the coffin. When I came out, it felt like a great burden lifted from my shoulder, I was so happy I could barely sleep and I couldn't stop laughing or smiling. It was also easy leaving since I had nothing to lose since I never went physically to a coC and no one else I knew belonged to the group (my sincerest regards to those whose family they had to leave). It was also great that there were no groups (outside one ICoC, which is a different beast), in the country, I even asked Brian on this, he couldn't find anything. That weekend I was baptised. I also looked for other denoms, and now I am practically sold on confessional Lutheranism due to a combination of scripture and church history (I'll leave it there). I find that Church history is a great bane of coC and other churches. Brian Yeager used the cheap underground theory that other fringe groups use, he also hated the Campbells. Another thing of note (specifically with Brian Yeager) is that there are (I think, I used directories such as Steve Rudd's) 3 non-institutional coCs in El Paso, Brian claimed to be the only "true" one since they don't agree with Bri**cough** scripture.
I did not however come out of this online debacle unscathed. I am still filled with fear when I hear sectarian and fringe groups speak, and I am somewhat hesitant to go to a church because I fear that I would be isolated and lead into another situation like this before, even among Lutherans. I also mistrust any 2000s HTML site because I associate it with him, I am serious here. I think it left a greater wound than I give off, and I am still hurt after a month. If you read this far, thank you. My situation is not as bad, in fact far from it, as others, however I still was hurt.
