Ex-Church of Christ Support Board

Hi there! I'm Sarah
This has been a long time coming. I have been an ex CoC member for nearly 15 years. My story may be different to some of yours. eleven years ago I admitted to my family I was leaving the church (my mom had a panic attack and fell down the stairs oh the drama - did I mention I left my CoC husband at the same time...) and a month later I had left the country. I still live in the UK (that's vague enough lol) and have coped I think surprisingly well with the isolation.
I have a lovely agnostic little family of my own and despite the years and the distance I am still pretty screwed up.
Why have I sought you now? This Supreme Court ruling has opened a new can of worms and I'm not coping with the Facebook (which is the only way some of my more understanding family members see my children grow up).i realised I would very much like a conversation with someone who understands.xx Sar

Welcome! I hope you find a spirit of love and acceptance here. What can of worms has been opened up?

Welcome Sarah.

Hi Sarah and welcome to the ex-board!

Thank you

Dodger- the can of worms: my mom has gotten more Facebook savvy reposting and tagging me in a lot of CoC articles- "love the sinner hate the sin" specifically about being gay. Now normally I ignore that stuff (don't get me started on what I'd LIKE to say) but my sister-in-law who is very opinionated and equally hard-headed has kicked off against her and it's like a battlefield on my page.

I asked her to back off but it sounds like I am siding with the bigotry... I even told my SIL that she'd never understand my mom because it's a lifestyle choice and would undo the fabric of her life to not believe in her own self righteousness. And she lashed at me for defending my mom's position.

Here I am again feeling like a child unable to adequately express myself. So I changed my profile picture to rainbow and that doesn't make me feel like I believe in equality but that I am rebelling from the church again.

Wow! Sounds like "block posts" is an option. Or do what I do and ditch FB all together!

Anyway, there's a lot of good posts and info, but most of us here bring baggage, so keep that grain of salt with you as you take it all in! Glad to have you!

I have a couple of cousins I am friends with on Facebook, but I've set things so I never see their posts. Makes life much calmer, really.

Welcome. I have ended up blocking almost everyone so I do not see their FB posts. I have also stopped adding "friends" and have a long list of requests...I also got tired of ignoring or nixing requests. In fact FB is pretty much used by me just so that other apps use my profile/account for a login. I do not want to see the 100th+ pictureof somebody's kid doing little league, pictures of what food they are eating, what show they are seeing, or how wonderful their spouse or parent. Jeezlepete, Seems like everyone has a the worlds most wonderful mother or father on those special days. And the long posts about how x-number of years ago their best friend became their spouse and how they are the most wonderful person ever are just too dreadful. And of course the 20 or 30 follow-up posts liking or making some "bless you" comment is just as tedious to me. And I hate the million variations on the "Hang in there, baby" poster.

When you mentioned your Mom's dramatics and falling down stairs my first thought was to smile and think about the "upper room" setting. Yes, I know this makes me a sort of misanthrope in some people's eyes. But I call BS on everyone saying how wonderful everything is their life and saying it over and over on FB...makes me think they doth protest\brag too much.

Hope this doesn't make me seem negative.

Welcome. Yes, those old issues can pop up from time to time, even when you think you've got a good handle on it. I've got my FB feed down to just those people who I genuinely want to interact with...there are very few family members on it, by the way.