Kudos to him for supporting your family!! Were you still able to be in touch with him? I am guessing he was up in years......so sorry for your loss.agricola wrote:Oddly enough, the one family member that DID note and send cards for Jewish holidays and the girls' bat mitzvah celebrations was my Uncle (the one who just died). He was a Christian Church pastor for around fifty years (and was once featured in Time, I believe it was, as one of the nation's top young preachers). He was always extremely gracious and never once even HINTED at evangelizing us.
Parents
Re: Parents
~Stone Cold Ivyrose Austin~
Re: Parents
Regularly in touch - he was even on facebook into his late 80's. He used to send me jokes via email, too.
He was in his early 90's when he died. He had four kids and we are all pretty close (facebook close) and he had grandchildren and great grandchildren. I've only met a couple of the grandchildren (who are all grownups and mostly married!). Big family, very closeknit.
His wife, my aunt, is still alive in her 90's but not doing particularly well.
He was in his early 90's when he died. He had four kids and we are all pretty close (facebook close) and he had grandchildren and great grandchildren. I've only met a couple of the grandchildren (who are all grownups and mostly married!). Big family, very closeknit.
His wife, my aunt, is still alive in her 90's but not doing particularly well.
History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That's why events are always reinterpreted when values change. We need new versions of history to allow for our current prejudices.
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Tsathoggua
- Posts: 258
- Joined: Thu Oct 16, 2014 12:55 pm
Re: Parents
agricola wrote:One of them was coc. I'm not sure about the other. Power for Today? Gospel Advocate? Maybe it was Christian Chronicle instead of Christianity Today. It was a long time ago!
All my father and (later) my stepmom did was send the kids Christmas presents - BLATANTLY Christmas gifts (mostly Santa at least) for many years. Then once I finally got through to them that we didn't 'do' Christmas, they stopped sending anything at all.
None of my immediate family ever once acknowledged ANY Jewish holidays and none of them even sent the girls a card or gift for their bat mitzvahs either.
Oddly enough, the one family member that DID note and send cards for Jewish holidays and the girls' bat mitzvah celebrations was my Uncle (the one who just died). He was a Christian Church pastor for around fifty years (and was once featured in Time, I believe it was, as one of the nation's top young preachers). He was always extremely gracious and never once even HINTED at evangelizing us.
Your recently-deceased uncle seems like a rather nifty fellow.
Re: Parents
Agricola, when Hannukah comes again I promise I'll send you a card if you pm me your address. I won't sign you up for any stupid Church of Christ magazines either. I'll sign you up for Minbars and Minuerets instead. Just kidding.
The philosophers have only interpreted the world, in various ways; the point is to change it.----Karl Marx
Re: Parents
Thanks for the thought, BH. But don't go to any trouble!B.H. wrote:Agricola, when Hannukah comes again I promise I'll send you a card if you pm me your address. I won't sign you up for any stupid Church of Christ magazines either. I'll sign you up for Minbars and Minuerets instead. Just kidding.
History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That's why events are always reinterpreted when values change. We need new versions of history to allow for our current prejudices.
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planodebbie
- Posts: 8
- Joined: Wed Jan 03, 2018 2:38 pm
Re: Parents
My dad pretty much disowned me 40 years ago (I'm 60 on 1/7). It wasn't totally because of leaving the CoC, more about the fact that I didn't and don't live my life like he believes I should. I grew up in a very big Church of Christ family and my dad was an elder. I attended Harding University. There was no choice to attend a secular school; however, I loved and treasure my time there.
I'm sad to say that my dad is 84 and I have seen him less than 10 times in the last 40 years. My daughter died two years ago and he didn't know her enough to care. When I reached out, he was ugly and mean. In his words, I have reaped what I sowed. I have tried and tried, but he refuses to forgive me for the 'sin' of disobeying him by marrying someone he didn't approve of (he was, however, Church of Christ).
I lived a secluded life with no option to be with other kids my age that were outside the church. My life is different now. I raised my two children differently. My dad is prideful and cannot accept the possibility that he could be wrong - he is very black and white. My mom is 100% submissive, so she is not part of my life either.
My dad disowned my younger brother 15+ years ago and my older brother 8 years ago. So none of his children are 'acceptable'.
A sad reflection on his faith and what he believes to be true. I respect the fact that he follows his own beliefs, but it is sad his beliefs have resulted in losses in his life.
I'm sad to say that my dad is 84 and I have seen him less than 10 times in the last 40 years. My daughter died two years ago and he didn't know her enough to care. When I reached out, he was ugly and mean. In his words, I have reaped what I sowed. I have tried and tried, but he refuses to forgive me for the 'sin' of disobeying him by marrying someone he didn't approve of (he was, however, Church of Christ).
I lived a secluded life with no option to be with other kids my age that were outside the church. My life is different now. I raised my two children differently. My dad is prideful and cannot accept the possibility that he could be wrong - he is very black and white. My mom is 100% submissive, so she is not part of my life either.
My dad disowned my younger brother 15+ years ago and my older brother 8 years ago. So none of his children are 'acceptable'.
A sad reflection on his faith and what he believes to be true. I respect the fact that he follows his own beliefs, but it is sad his beliefs have resulted in losses in his life.
Last edited by planodebbie on Wed Jan 03, 2018 6:47 pm, edited 3 times in total.
Dare to think for yourself.
Re: Parents
Sorry to hear that planodebbie, that is so sad. Ours were pretty much dead and gone by the time we left.
Isn't the world wonderful...I am all for rational optimism and I am staying positive.
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Cootie Brown
- Posts: 3997
- Joined: Sat Feb 20, 2016 4:34 pm
- Location: TN
Re: Parents
Fortunately the c of C and groups like them are dying out. Their numbers are shrinking rather rapidly.
Re: Parents
Planodebbie,planodebbie wrote:My dad pretty much disowned me 40 years ago (I'm 60 on 1/7). It wasn't totally because of leaving the CoC, more about the fact that I didn't and don't live my life like he believes I should. I grew up in a very big Church of Christ family and my dad was an elder. I attended Harding University. There was no choice to attend a secular school; however, I loved and treasure my time there.
I'm sad to say that my dad is 84 and I have seen him less than 10 times in the last 40 years. My daughter died two years ago and he didn't know her enough to care. When I reached out, he was ugly and mean. In his words, I have reaped what I sowed. I have tried and tried, but he refuses to forgive me for the 'sin' of disobeying him by marrying someone he didn't approve of (he was, however, Church of Christ).
I lived a secluded life with no option to be with other kids my age that were outside the church. My life is different now. I raised my two children differently. My dad is prideful and cannot accept the possibility that he could be wrong - he is very black and white. My mom is 100% submissive, so she is not part of my life either.
My dad disowned my younger brother 15+ years ago and my older brother 8 years ago. So none of his children are 'acceptable'.
A sad reflection on his faith and what he believes to be true. I respect the fact that he follows his own beliefs, but it is sad his beliefs have resulted in losses in his life.
That is heartbreaking to me.....did you find sort of "substitute" parents as you grew older?? How did your brothers handle being disowned and how are they now?? I would think the three of you would be closer as a result of all of this.....
Re: Parents
Planodebbie it sounds like you and I have similar childhoods and parental responses to our desiring to live how we want