Ex-Church of Christ Support Board

Did anyone else go to a church where the elders and preacher seemed obsessed with having extra bible studies during the week? We always talk about how the CoC was a three time a week gig, but I remember in my teenage years we were lucky if it was just three times a week.

When I was 13 or 14 one of the elders got this bright idea to have a teenage bible study at the church building on Saturday mornings...at 8:00 am. And of course if you weren't there it was just like being gone on Sunday morning. If you weren't there, you better have a good excuse. I remember being miserable, losing my one morning a week to sleep in, to go somewhere I didn't want to be. All of my friends were sleeping in and watching Saturday morning cartoons, and I had to be at church. After about four or five weeks, people stopped coming and by week eight I think my dad and I were the only ones to show up, so they finally cancelled the Saturday morning bible studies.

Not much longer after that stopped, the preacher decided to have a men's bible study and breakfast on Saturday mornings. So once again, even though I was 14, I was baptized and therefore I was one of the men, so I had to be there. My one day to sleep in, gone once again. For several years, the congregation was divided into about four groups. One Friday night a month, someone in our group would host a bible study over at their house. You can probably imagine a teenager in high school looking forward to going out with friends on a Friday night...only to be told I had to go to a bible study at someone else's house instead. "What would you rather be doing than studying God's word!?" My parents would ask, as if I should be looking forward to it. There was also the time they decided to start Sunday evening services an hour early to have extra classes before. One for the men, one for the women, one for the teens and one for the younger kids. Another hour of my weekend kissed goodbye there as well.

I know that even today, every Monday night one of the members hosts a bible study at their house, because every time I call my dad on a Monday night he can't talk because he is there. Looking back it just feels like the CoC wants to be involved in every moment of your free time. They were trying to start bible studies constantly during the week, and of course you had to be there or you would be looked down upon. Did anyone else's church do this? Did you ever feel like the CoC was trying to control you outside of the normal Sunday and Wednesday night times?

Look, mom and dad... God's word has been written down for a couple thousand years now. It will still be there on Sunday, when I'm not too tired to read it.

At least I'd imagine that'd be what I'd say.

I didn't quite have the situation that you did, but there were a few times that I found myself stretched thin. If there was a gospel meeting in the area, we were obligated to go at least twice. We'd have to hurry home from school and guzzle down supper and hit the road. And that's not counting the ones at our church, which basically meant screw your education, because you are going to be way too tired and have way too little time to do your homework this week. Hope you don't have a test! (But don't worry, God will take care of it. Somehow.)

One of the recognized characteristics of a cult is that it is demanding of members' time. I have been in a congregation where I'd be tied up 5 or 6 nights a week. But it quickly leads to burnout.

MusicMan826 wrote:When I was 13 or 14 one of the elders got this bright idea to have a teenage bible study at the church building on Saturday mornings...at 8:00 am. ?

Blech.

Many religious people think that if they worship early in the morning they are somehow more righteous for that.

The people who attended early service were always considered more holy than the ones who attended the late service.

I never woke up before 8 am when I was a teenager.

They're ALWAYS adding "services" -- Kids' Club, Bible Bowl / L2L practice, Monday Night for the Master, Tuesday Prayer Group, Seniors Breakfast, Ladies Class, Men's Prayer Group, Thursday Night Study, Friday Youth Group, Devo, Youth Rally, Gospel Meeting/Seminar, Gospel Workshop, Marriage Retreat, Every Other Sunday Singing Practice, Ladies Day, Monthly Birthday/Anniversary Party, Lunch Time Bible Study, Fourth of July, New Year's Eve.

Enough is Enough!

Did any of you have parents that did home Bible studies? My parents tried that some, but it didn't last long. I hated doing that.

My dad did those Jule Miller filmstrips. I hated those.

We never went quite as far as having extra Bible studies, but there were plenty of activities over the years that ate into free time. We often had to hand out flyers for Vacation Bible School or Gospel Meetings. The "fellowships," singings, clean-up days and all that were events we HAD to attend. No school activities could ever be scheduled that would interfere with missing or even being late for any church function.

When I hit 30 or so, I realized it had gone too far. I was on the group that helped organize a monthly singing for the residents at a retirement home, and ended up being the sole organizer, although other members were good about going. I was on a "visitation team," which is another story. And I was one of several who helped with weekly services at yet another retirement home. It was a decent-sized congregation, about 450 or so, so we had teams of 3 who were only supposed to conduct the services once a quarter. Almost every week, the deacon in charge would call me on Sunday morning and beg me to come help because someone wouldn't be there. Some of the time I went, out of guilt, obligation or whatever. The last straw was when he called one Sunday morning to ask, and I declined, citing a family celebration that afternoon. His reply was, "Can't you do that some other time? I really need you today." I said no. I had myself removed from that particular effort not long after that.

So, yes, they do try to take up your free time.

We had an area-wide singing one Friday a month, and would have to travel an hour+ to whatever congregation was hosting. I also did all the Bible Bowls. We didn't do actual devotionals at home, but we had to do BB study- we couldn't go do anything fun unless we had our section pretty much memorized. We also had gospel meeting-type things just for teens and we would travel 3-4 hours to any that might possibly be in the area. Then there were the Teen-things on Friday nights, the optional Homecoming thing that they had to do to offer teens instead of going to any dances. Honestly, church did take up more than the 3x per week, but at the time I didn't seem to mind... I was the perfect child. Ironically, both my brother and sister rebelled in their teens, but both are still faithful members. I didn't rebel as a teen, but left completely by 21. Weird!

faithfyl wrote:I never woke up before 8 am when I was a teenager.

And well you shouldn't have! Teenagers need more sleep than pre-teens and adults. Those 8am Saturday Bible studies were not only bad for the teens' faith--making them resent religion--but quite possibly bad for their health too.

Lev

What has become popular in recent years is book studies. You have to purchase some book by a Christian author and the whole Bible study is based on that book. I don't do those any more either. Someone's pockets were getting lined. I was tired of buying books.