A lot questions and doubt

[BabesNotHot]

I’m glad I found this site. I happened to find it from reddit and I feel like it’s perfect timing for what I’m going through.

I guess I would be considered a coC lifer. I was born into the coC, and my mom, grandma and great grandma are all in the coC. My dad was converted after marrying my mom and a few other family members are members of the coC as well. I don’t feel as if I had a bad experience in the coC. I’ve moved around a lot so I’ve been in different coCs throughout my life. I think I would be considered part of the mainstream coC.

Like I said, I don’t think I’ve had too bad of an experience. I’m in my 20s, and I’ve made tons of friends who I still talk to. I did normal stuff that most kids did. I played sports, was able to hang out with all different kinds of people and would listen to rap music with my parents. My parents aren’t too conservative compared to other ppl in the coC. But I still had the same teachings that a lot of you had, no instruments in church, be silent where the scriptures are silent and the coC is the one true church.

I started to question things when I was in college. I actually had a gf and even though at the time I knew it wasn’t what God would want, I began having oral sex. There were times that I thought of breaking up with her because I felt really guilty of what I was doing. But I didn’t actually start questioning the coC and religion until I took a religious freedoms class. The class talked a lot about Christianity and the history of how Christians were persecuted and eventually gained religious freedom in non Christian countries and then how they eventually persecuted other religions when they were on top. This class made me think about stuff I had never thought to think about. How was the Bible constructed, was the coC there in the early days of Christianity. I also didn’t like the politics of the church and Christianity in general. The church’s position on lgbt people and the role of women to name a few doesn’t sit right with me and was a big part of my disillusionment.

After that I kinda didn’t think about it for awhile and just glided through. I lived with my parents after college for a bit and just went to church with them and tried to listen to what they were saying from a new perspective and it didn’t do anything for me. I live in a different city now by myself. But my parents still ask if I went to church and have I come closer to picking a new church in this city.

Lately I’ve been looking at criticisms of the coC, such as how they interpret scripture, the singing and it’s opened my mind to other interpretations of the scripture that I never would have thought of. And also I never knew the history of the coC and how it was found of the American Restoration Movement and from Alexander Campbell. I still don’t really know what to make out of all the information that I’ve found out. I’m honestly leaning towards agnosticism/atheism, I don’t think I could see myself going to another church.

I also haven’t told anyone my thoughts or that I want to leave the church. I don’t think my parents would stop loving me or shun me or anything like that. I think they’ll be disappointed and obviously they will be worried about my “soul” and me going to hell but it’s still a daunting task to tell them and the rest of my family, but I know it’s something that will have to happen eventually.

But I’m glad I found this site and I look forward to talking to you all!

[Tsathoggua]

Hey, glad to have you aboard! I enjoyed reading about your experience. I wound up taking the "agnostic" route, myself....

[Cootie Brown]

There is Christian beliefs and then there is Christian History. Bart Ehrman is a really good religious historian to read if you want to know how accurate the bible is based on historical research.

My wife joined the Methodist Church after we left the c of C. I am no longer religious but I do attend church with her. Methodist are really nice folks and they are not the least bit legalistic or dogmatic about their "beliefs."

Read as much as you can on this board and I think you will find that helpful. Leaving the c of C, if that is your eventual choice, isn't easy. Expect serious blowback and condemnation. They can't help it, that is just who they are. When you believe you are the only ones on planet earth that has the truth you can't help but become arrogant & self righteous.

Oh yeah, welcome aboard.

[Ivy]

Welcome!!

[agricola]

Welcome to the ex-board.

I think you may find that many people enjoy belonging to a church, not because they necessarily believe (or even know) every single thing that church teaches, but instead they enjoy, love and need the community of the PEOPLE who attend together.

[Moogy]

Welcome to our refuge!

[idontgotoFC]

I found this through Reddit as well. Welcome!